By Mike Renzella
The Haldimand Press
CALEDONIA—Last week, an anonymous post on the Facebook group ‘What’s Up Caledonia’ asked the community a question: would you be interested in a local support group where men could get together and talk through difficult emotions? As of publication, the post has received 390 likes and over 100 comments, indicating that yes, indeed, the interest is there.
“Hello Caledonia… I was thinking about organizing a group called Men-tal health, an organization in town to help support men with mental support,” read the post. “A judgement-free zone with other men where you can let your emotions and feelings out…. There’s a stigma men can’t talk and I’m here to say we can!”
The Press reached out to the poster, who turned out to be 33-year-old Caledonia resident Andy Armstrong. An avid outdoorsman with a love of fishing, camping, and paintball, Armstrong spoke with us about the inspiration behind his post.
“It’s just seeing how men are treated and seeing videos online and hearing radio stations saying that men have no support and are hurting and need to talk,” said Armstrong. “There are millions of men out there that I know feel the same way. I want men to know you are not weak for needing a boost, pick up, or someone to listen to you…. Friends and family are great, but they might not know how you actually feel. Sometimes it’s easier to open up to a stranger because they won’t judge you.”
Armstrong said that his own personal experiences with mental health and the barriers he has faced in seeking help led him to reach out to the public.
“I’ve gone down a very dark path myself with mental health and it’s very hard to even get the courage to ask for help because you’re afraid people will see you as weak, or the feeling you’re letting someone down. Men are supposed to be strong and emotionless, but we are not robots. Men have emotions and struggles too. It’s 2023, things need to change.”
While Armstrong’s idea is still fresh in his mind, he has put some thought into how he would structure the group, should it come to pass: “I would like to have meetings in person once a week face to face. That way, if you need a hug you can get one.”
He continued, “My role would be to organize the meetings and events that happen there, like the programming and everything, and share my story so people can get the ball rolling. I want to let everyone know you’re not alone.”
Armstrong said he would ask participants to keep anything discussed at a meeting confidential, to ensure the group remained a safe, welcoming environment.
He said that while he is hoping to start the group as its own entity, he would consider working with existing community support groups in the area if the opportunity arose. He said the ultimate direction of the group would be a collaborative effort, with feedback from participants on how to make it the best it can be.
When asked about any potential challenges or obstacles he may encounter in getting such a group started, or any backlash he might face as a result, Armstrong said, “This is bigger than the backlash I’ll get – this is for the men. I’d rather my friend cry on my shoulder than me cry at his funeral.”
He concluded, “I just hope I can let men know you’re not weak for having bad or stressful thoughts or feelings and to help them be able to walk in with confidence and walk out with more. I want a strong future for men to be able to feel free to express themselves and to know they aren’t the only ones that feel like this and know that strangers will have your back like family. Everyone needs to feel the love.”
Judging by the response to his query, it’s clear that the community in Caledonia is responsive to Armstrong’s idea.
Currently, if you are experiencing a mental health crisis, or have a related issue you need help with, you can contact Community Addiction and Mental Health Services of Haldimand and Norfolk for information on their adult mental health programming at 519-587-4658 or Haldimand Norfolk REACH at 519-597-2441.
Additionally, the Federal government offers a 24/7 texting-based service for mental health concerns through Wellness Together Canada. Simply text WELLNESS to 741741 to be connected.
